


Swapping And You

by E350tb



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Body Image, Bodyswap, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-02
Updated: 2019-09-02
Packaged: 2020-10-05 15:27:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20491058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/E350tb/pseuds/E350tb
Summary: You'd think body swapping would be a fun, light-hearted and short-lived romp.You'd be wrong.





	Swapping And You

**Author's Note:**

> Did this as part of a trade on DA. Enjoy!

**Swapping And You**

Pearl walked into the small room, a clipboard under her arm. Her jacket had been replaced with a bright, friendly looking sweater, and she wore a pair of glasses for no reason other than it made her look the part.

The small back room of the Barriga house - the ‘guest room’, they called it - had two beds and a futon, which Pearl immediately took. She smiled at her two guests.

“Okay,” she said. “Week Two! How has it been going for the two of you?”

She pursed her lips slightly as Sadie Miller sighed, laying on her back and staring at the roof.

“It _sucked_,” she replied. “I can’t deal with this whole band thing - I mean, I can’t even _sing_, and…”

“Now let’s not say it _sucked_,” said Pearl brightly. “Let’s say that you had… _difficulties._”

Sadie rolled her eyes and flipped her off. On the other bed, Lars shot up, scowling.

“_Lars!_” she snapped. “She’s trying to help!”

“Yeah?” Sadie snapped back. “Help us do what? Because we’re _not _adjusting, Sadie. And unless Peraldot-”

“Peridot.”

“-_Peridot _finds a fix, and she _won’t_, we’re _stuck like_-”

“Okay, okay,” Pearl raised her hands. “Lets calm down. Peridot _will_ fix this, I assure you - until she does, how about we discuss your feelings about your bodies, hmm? Have they changed since you… _exchanged?_”

Sadie - or to be more accurate, _Lars_ \- thought back to the beginning…

* * *

It had been a morning like any other.

Sadie slowly opened her eyes, wincing at the strange _musk_ that seemed to surround her. The air smelled strongly of men’s deodorant, and the room felt hotter and stuffier than her normal bedroom.

Slowly glancing around, she found herself staring at a cavernous roof, and then at posters lining the walls. Those _definitely _weren’t hers (although one was _of_ her, she noted with a blush.) In fact, her groggy mind soon realised exactly _where_ she’d seen this room before - she was in Lars’ attic bedroom.

“What…”

She sat up, and was immediately struck by a dizzying sense of vertigo. She was _tall_, uncomfortably so, and she felt strange aches and sensations she’d never felt before. Her voice seemed off too, but perhaps that was just early morning croakiness? She pondered as she rubbed a hand over her chest-

She looked down, eyes widening as her sleepiness melted away.

Oh no.

_Oh no._

She was looking at Lars’ bony, pink body, more skin than bone (god he needed to eat more.) She brushed a hand over her head - the vast majority of her hair was gone, save for a small tuft at the front. Her ears had long, donut-shaped lobes.

“Oh shit,” she muttered, “I’m _Lars._”

She closed her eyes, breathing in deeply. _No need to panic, Sadie_, she told herself - this had happened to Steven. She just needed to head over to her house, wake herself up, and then migrate to Switzerland so she didn’t have to discuss this with her friend. Nice and easy, nice and easy.

She dressed quickly, throwing on whatever Lars had left on the floor (it felt decidedly crusty and more than a little sweaty, and she couldn’t help but wince.) Quickly but quietly, so as not to wake either the Barrigas or the Off-Colors, she scampered down the stairs and out the door, heading for her own house.

She was met halfway.

* * *

At about the same time, Lars had woken up, coming out of a peculiar dream. Fluorite had been a baker, and no matter what he told her she was insistent on putting bacon grease into the donuts…

He stared at the ceiling again, focusing on absolutely nothing but his dream, too confused to do much else. Eventually, though, he shook his head - time to start the day.

He sat up and immediately felt deeply _weird_. His body weight felt off, much heavier than it had - and that couldn’t have just been the drowsiness, could it? Now that he thought of it, the room looked off too - his stairs went _down_, not _up_, didn’t they? And usually he was further from the bed when he sat up, wasn’t he? And-

He looked down.

He pursed his lips.

“Oh, cool,” he said. “It’s body swapping shit again. _Welp,_ better go see Steven…”

He rolled out of bed, looking at the floor for clothes. He found none - why didn’t people just wear what they did yesterday, it was _easier_ \- and instead ambled over to the closet. He was heading over to Steven’s, _ASAP._ There was no way, _no way_ he was spending the day in Sadie’s body...

* * *

Sadie’s heart sank.

Her own body was ambling along - its user clearly completely unused to her short frame. (She wondered if she looked as awkward - she still felt a bit ill from the height difference.) It was a mess - clearly the occupant had no idea how to fix a bra, although the distress in their face demonstrated that that was the least of their worries.

“S-Sadie?” her own voice whimpered.

“Lars?”

There was a long silence.

“How mad would you be if I swore with your voice?” asked Lars.

“I’ve already done it with yours.”

“Cool.” Lars took in a deep breath. “_Fuck!_”

A few birds, startled, jolted from a nearby branch.

“Okay, let’s… let’s be calm about this,” said Sadie, wiping some sweat from her brow. “Let’s get to the Temple. Steven… Steven can fix this, right?”

“And if he can’t?” snapped Lars.

Sadie glanced down at the ground and fought back a wave of nausea.

“We’ll cross that bridge when it comes…”

* * *

They had long had to cross that bridge.

The culprit, perhaps unsurprisingly, was Peridot - her _neurological connection device_ had failed, and thus their consciousnesses had been swapped - among others.

Irritatingly for Lars, nobody _else_ had it that bad. Steven and Connie didn’t seem to be too worried, and in any case were able to spend much of their time as Stevonnie anyway. Greg was a bit weirded out at being in Garnet’s body, certainly, but the fusion (in his body) handily helped him through. It left them - the only ones in the town proper to be switched - feeling a bit… _inadequate._

“I try,” sighed Lars. “I really do, and I think the band get it, but… I just can’t hold a tune. And it just feels like I’m making a complete jerk of myself in front of the cool kids…”

“Lars, they _like _you,” Sadie reminded him. “Don’t worry about…”

“...and on top of that, I’ve been feeling really… weird, lately?” added Lars. “Like, I get pains, and I feel weirdly hot and…”

Sadie blushed.

“Oh god,” she grunted. “Okay, yeah, I could’ve lived without knowing that you were going through… _that_. Oh jeez…”

“You mean the - _ahem_ \- time of-” Pearl began.

“Don’t say it, don’t say it, _don’t say it,_” urged Sadie, burying her head in the pillow. “I do _not_ want to think about Lars having my… nope. So much nope.”

Lars bit his lip.

“Oh,” he said. “That’s what it is. Makes sense, I guess.”

“What about you, Sadie?” asked Pearl. “Is there anything of… _that nature _that you’d like to share?”

“Nah,” Sadie shrugged. “Lars’... _thing…_ is pretty easy to handle, to be honest. It’s more everything else.”

“Everything else?” Lars sat up, a testy expression on his face.

“You sweat a lot,” said Sadie. “I mean, a _lot_. And you rash when you use your body spray; I think you’ve gotta find a new brand, you’re probably allergic. And you just feel… hold on.”

She held out her wrist and grabbed it with her other hand. Her thumb and index finger easily met.

“You’re skin and bone,” she said. “Like, you’ve gotta eat.”

Lars looked down.

“I know,” he muttered. “But… but sometimes I just don’t have an appetite, you know? I think it’s ‘cause of the whole pink thing.”

“You were skinny before that, though, weren’t you?” asked Pearl.

Lars frowned, clenching his fists.

“Can we move it on, man?” he asked.

Sadie nodded.

“I thought I’d adapt to being tall,” she said. “But every time I stand up straight, I still feel like I’m gonna throw up. And I can’t sleep well - your body gets colder a lot easier than mine. And if I’m honest, your room stinks.”

“It does not!”

“Lars,” said Pearl, raising a hand, “Sadie needs to be able to air her thoughts, you can’t-”

“Air her thoughts?” Lars scowled. “What about _my _thoughts?!”

“You’ll have time-”

“No!” snapped Lars. “You got to dump on me? I’m dumping on you!”

Sadie frowned.

“I… I mean I guess…”

“This body is way too short!” exclaimed Lars. “Like, I can’t even reach anything! I have to get your mom to do it! It’s like… cartoonishly tiny!”

“Lars, don’t…”

“No, I’m not finished!” continued Lars. “Every time I go outside, I see people staring at me!”

“S… staring?”

“I mean look at this!” He motioned down at his body. “I mean, I get it, it’s hardly a bikini bod, but it could at least have _normal proportions!_ I feel like I’m walking around in a god damn _pillow!_ And I just want to go back to my own body so I can at least walk around without people thinking I’m some kind of _fat, midget freak!_”

There was a very long silence. Lars breathed heavily, calming himself down.

“..._wow_.”

Sadie was sitting up, fists clutching the end of the bed. She was shaking, her face twisted in rage, yet at the same time her eyes were pricking with tears.

“Oh, _shit_, I-I didn’t mean-” Lars began.

“Yeah,” said Sadie. “You _did._ And you know what? You’re _right_. B-but you could at least try not to… to point it…”

She stood up.

“Look, I’m done,” she said. “Just… tell me when Peridot’s ready.”

She stormed out, covering her eyes.

“Sadie, wait! _Wait!_” Lars called. “I didn’t…”

He buried his face in her hands.

“Okay,” said Pearl at last, “I’m going to wrap this up; hopefully we won’t need to come back for Week Three, okay? But… look, I can’t tell you how to feel, but…”

“I know, I know, I suck,” grunted Lars. “I’ll see you next fucking week.”

“Lars-”

Before she could say anything else, Lars was gone, the door slamming hard behind him.

Pearl sighed heavily, making a few notes on her clipboard before getting up and stepping back out into the Barriga living room. Lars’ mother was there, talking to another woman - Dr. Brooks, Jeff’s mother. They turned as she left.

“Anything you-”

“I’m sorry, Martha, patient confidentiality,” replied Pearl. “I just… I think it’s getting to all of us, you know? Any updates from Peridot?”

Dr. Brooks frowned. “She says she’s _getting there_, but she can’t say if it’ll be fixed before the end of the month.”

“Looks like we _will _be doing a Week Three then,” nodded Pearl.

“If I can get Lars to come back,” mused Martha. “He doesn’t like these sessions, and…”

“I know, but they’re good for him,” replied Pearl. “He needs the outlet.”

She turned to Dr. Brooks.

“I’m sorry-”

“Don’t apologize!” Dr. Brooks smiled. “We’ve all got to get through! I mean, _stars_, it could be worse…”

Pearl smiled back.

“Well, I’ll see you later,” she said. “Have to pick up Jeff from school. See you later, Pearl?”

Dr. Brooks nodded. “See you later, Dr. Brooks.”

With nothing left to be said, Pearl walked away.

**Author's Note:**

> Woo, twist ending!


End file.
